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Words of Wisdom Day 19 featuring Frannie Noble

What does community mean to you?

“Community is formed by the common ground that connects us. The core is close family and friends with whom I have the deepest connections, but it expands to include neighbors and professional networks too. “

Why is having a soul tribe important to you?

“Brene Brown writes that the "I don’t care what anyone thinks about me" mentality is way off base. We SHOULD care what some people think about us. For me, those people are your soul tribe. They call you out on your bullshit, they ask the hard questions and they are relentless in their support for you. 

Human beings are made for connection. A soul tribe is a direct expression of that core part of our being.The work to find these people and to build relationships with them is critical. To find them we have to be brave and vulnerable, but with them we can continue to be brave and vulnerable in this crazy, wild world. ”

What words of advice do you have for women seeking out deeper community and connection:

“Show up.

1. Show up and do the work to meet and build connection with people. You will not build your soul tribe through Instagram messaging. You may meet someone that way, but the building, trying, growing part happens in real time and real space. Find meet up groups for interesting topics, go somewhere new, meet people in person. 

2. While building those connections or investing in existing relationships, you have to keep showing up. If someone's parent dies, or they get a scary diagnosis, if their partner is being a total ass, or their professional life is a hot mess you still have to show up for them. This soul stuff isn't about the good times. Most often it's forged through the tough stuff. Send a card, a text, flowers, a meal, or, consider using the call function on your phone and CALL THEM! You do not get to back away because it's awkward or scary. We need each other. Show up.”

 What are your thoughts when it comes to personal growth:

“My greatest growth has come from talking to myself - practicing mindfulness essentially. Thankfully, I can do this in my head and not scare my roommates or partner.

I've slowly learned to acknowledge feelings - both good and bad ones, and to figure out why I'm feeling that way. Instead of letting feelings overwhelm me, I can see them and process them. In a moment of anxiety for example, I have learned to stop and ask myself, "what are you freaking out about?" And the answer is usually pretty clear. It sounds something like this; "I'm stressed about attending the conference and having everyone there know more about the topic than I do. I'm going to look stupid." The questions continue, like "what makes you think that?"or "Has that ever happened?", but the process of being able to stop, acknowledge feelings, and interact with them has been huge for me. You don't have to ignore your feelings and plow on ahead with life carrying anxiety with you; working through those moments can bring a lot of freedom. “